You’ve never let me down. When I’m frustrated and all alone you’re always there for me. When I call, you answer with NO questions asked! I don’t need a reason to get close to you or be in your company. You accept me as I am. You’ve never disappointed me and although my interaction with you provides false hope and a sense of safety, I’ll take it! Because False hope is better than no hope.
I’m worth more than what you have to offer but since you’re the only one that SEEMS to be offering…I’ll take it! I know you’re not good for me but I have a hard time walking away from your embrace. You treat me so bad but I love you. I love you more than the pain you cause me. It’s a trade I am willing to accept.
After we’re together, I feel guilty and physically sick, yet I can’t take my mind off of you. I wake up thinking about you. I go to bed with you on my mind. You’re the reason I come home each day. You satisfy what noONE else can. You make me BETTER…wait..I mean BITTER.
When I drink, there are no asked questions, misconceived notions, or tricky words that need to be said. There’s no need to think too much or pretend. You allow me to believe whatever I need to believe to get PAST the things that seem “im-PAST-able.” Sometimes I think about letting you go, but when I look at what this world has to offer I run back into your bosom to experience my false hope. Maybe one day I’ll find something that I can really depend on, but until then …
There’s a misconception about the avid alcohol drinker. An alcoholic doesn’t drink to fulfill but to allow hurtful moments to stand still. There’s a need or void that longs to be filled. The problem occurs when the drinker has to decide who or what fills that need or void. The alcoholic chooses alcohol. The liar chooses to lie. The fornicator chooses sex. The drug addict chooses drugs. The procrastinator chooses time. What’s your easy choice? For the alcoholic, it’s alcohol.
There’s nothing you can say or do to deter the behaviors of any addict. The questions then becomes: how you help that individual?
Love Them!
Signed, Survivor
